Step by Step: A Beginner's Guide to Public Speaking

Think public speaking is just for extroverts, CEOs, or polished TED Talkers? Guess again!

Public speaking is for anyone with a voice and a story to tell—including you.

As exciting as that is, it can be equally terrifying. If your heart races at the thought of speaking in front of others, don’t worry, you are not alone. The fear is real and it is shared by millions of people. And I’ll let you in on a little secret…even the most seasoned speakers get a little bit nervous about stepping on stage. The difference between you and them: they didn’t let that fear stop them!

If you are ready to tell your fear to kick rocks and step up to the stage, this guide is for you. 

This guide is for beginner, novice, or even experienced speakers who need a refresher—especially those who have ever felt silenced, unsure, or overlooked. You are not here to perform to perfection, speaking from a script like an A-list actor. You are here to show up, mess up, take up space, and speak with the presence and authenticity that make you who you are - One step at a time.

I know it’s easy for me to say all this, but you are still wondering where you to even begin. Keep reading for some basic steps you can take to overcome your fear of the stage, manage your nerves, and build your confidence one step at a time!

Step 1: Name that Fear, Then Reframe It

It’s like that game show “Name That Tune” except you will need to name your fear instead of that weird song from the 80’s that you completely forgot about until you heard it on the radio last week.

Fear is a signal from that part of your brain that is designed solely to keep you safe. It is not a stop sign (more like a yield sign…)

Question your fear. Treat it like its own self that needs to be acknowledged.

Are you afraid of judgment? Making mistakes? Freezing on stage? These are typical among speakers and aren’t a problem unless you let them hold you back. Try this if you find that your fear is causing you to resist taking opportunities to speak and share your story:

Write it down. Give the fear a name. Then question it. Ask yourself “Why am I feeling this fear? What is the worst thing that could happen and what is most likely to happen?”

Then I want you to continue the conversation between you and your fear with these questions: “What if this fear is also a sign that I care? That I want to connect? That I am stepping into something powerful?”

Reframing your fear as energy—instead of something to escape—helps you begin to work with it, not against it. No one walks away from fear. We keep it with us and move on anyway. 

Step 2: Know Your Message (and Make It Personal)

Public speaking is not about sounding fancy, using the longest words or the biggest stats. It is simply about connection. Now, that doesn’t mean that you can’t or shouldn’t use big words and bigger stats if warranted. In fact, stats and technical terms can be quite effective in driving your message home IF you don’t go overboard and IF you find a way to attach your story and purpose to them. Remember, the biggest impacts often come from the smallest moments.

But, before you worry about data and facts or how to stand without feeling shaky, start with your message. What is the one thought, feeling, action, or response you want your audience to walk away with? Start there, and work backward to build your roadmap to what will become your speech.

Build your speech on personal experiences, your expertise, your emotions, things you find interesting or humorous, and any relevant information you think should be included. And remember, you have creative liberty to form the message in the way you feel comfortable. So don’t worry about what the “experts” are doing or how the most famous speakers are delivering their speeches. Because it will look very different for them than it will for you, and that is A-OK.

Step 3: Practice Out Loud

You do not have to get it “right” on the first try. In fact, you probably won’t get it “right” on the 7th try. But you will get it better each time you do it and that is what matters.

Practice is simply the art of learning. We learn by doing, we do by practicing. Practice, repetition, and trial and error in a controlled low-stakes environment are what build confidence. 

Start messy. Say your talk out loud in your room. To your pet. In your car. Record yourself on your phone. Hear your voice. Let it wobble and shake, forget complete sentences, say “umm” 74 times, and do it without judging yourself.

Then refine.

Edit. Practice again. Choose key points to emphasize. Notice what feels right in your body when you say it. Notice how you feel in general. Over time, you are not just practicing words—you are training your nervous system to feel safer in the spotlight.

Each time you speak, you build a little more trust with yourself.

Remember that confidence is not never feeling afraid but knowing you can keep going even when you are.

Step 4: Create a Grounding Routine

Routines are magic for the nervous system. They provide support and familiarity in otherwise unfamiliar or uncomfortable situations.

Some grounding routines to try:

• Box/rectangle breathing (4 counts in, hold the inhale without tension for 4 counts, 4 counts out, hold the exhale for 4 seconds without tension) – do this 2-3 times
• A mantra: “My story matters. My voice is enough.”
• Stretch your body
• Place your feet firmly on the ground and allow yourself to be aware of your presence
• Hydrate – water is your friend. Water will help with dry mouth, performance anxiety, nerves, and so much more!

Find what works for you and return to it before every speaking engagement. This will provide you with a base level of comfort and signal your brain that you are in familiar territory.

Step 5: Be Yourself

When the moment comes—whether it is a Zoom meeting, an open mic, or a conference—just be real. The real YOU.

You don’t need to become someone else to be a “good” speaker. In fact, the most compelling speakers are often the most authentic ones. As I tell all my clients: “Be the speaker you are RIGHT NOW.”

Speak from the heart. Make eye contact. Pause and breathe. Let the silence hold you and your words move you. You’re not just delivering a message. You are creating an experience.

I leave you today with this:

Public speaking is not just a skill or a job requirement. It is an act of reclamation.

Especially for women, BIPOC, LGBTQ+ folks, and anyone who has been silenced or marginalized, stepping into your story can feel like a radical act.

And it starts with one small step.

So take it.

Speak up. Speak out. And remember - you don’t have to be fearless to take the stage. You just have to be brave enough to begin.

Ready to practice your voice in a safe, supportive space or dive into the magic of your own story? Book your FREE call with me today and let’s discover what is waiting to be shared in your story!